Grandparents: Make Memories That Last

You Time is Limited

When it comes to the early years of a child’s life, time is fleeting—but the memories you help create can last a lifetime. Research shows that children generally start forming lasting autobiographical memories around age 3 or 4, with more structured, narrative memories developing by 5 or 6. Before that, most experiences simply fade. This makes the time grandparents spend with their grandchildren more important than ever.

Think about the ordinary moments you share. A grandmother baking cookies with three excited grandchildren might seem like just a fun afternoon. But it’s far more than that. The scent of chocolate chips, the laughter over a spilled measuring cup, and the pride in seeing a tray come out golden from the oven—these are the details children often remember into adulthood.

Contrast that with things children are less likely to retain: the exact toys or gifts you gave them, the day-to-day chores you helped with, or even attending a baseball game where they didn’t get much playing time. These routine or transactional moments often fade, even though at the time they seemed important. What does stick are the emotionally rich experiences—the messy cookie-baking afternoon, the first time you taught them to ride a bike, the backyard water fight, or the quiet story you read together before bed. These are the memories that leave a permanent imprint.

This isn’t to say that grandparents should stage grandiose experiences every weekend. Simple rituals repeated over time—reading a bedtime story, planting a garden together, building a small craft—imprint far more deeply than sporadic extravagance. The repetition reinforces memory, while the emotional connection makes it stick.

Grandparents, you have a unique advantage. You can step into a different rhythm of life than busy parents, slowing down long enough to savor the moment, laugh without rushing, and be fully present. The memories that endure are the hands-on, heart-in, fully engaged interactions. A child may forget the exact amount of money you gave them for a birthday or the brand of baseball glove you bought, but they will remember the excitement when you cheered the loudest at their first home run, the warmth of your hug after a scraped knee, or the laughter as you all danced around the living room to a favorite song.

Every hug, every shared joke, every little triumph matters. Time is short. Life is busy. But the memories you create now are the ones that will outlast everything else. Baking cookies, swinging at the park, crafting at a table—these are not just activities; they are the foundations of your grandchildren’s lifelong recollections. Don’t let them slip by unnoticed.