Respecting your right to live peacefully or a Tall Fence.

What Makes a Good Neighbor?

They say you can pick your friends, but you can’t pick your family. I’d argue the same holds true for neighbors. You don’t get a choice in who moves in next door or across the street. For better or worse, those people become part of your daily environment.

Sure, sometimes neighbors grow into friends—sharing cookouts, watching each other’s kids, trading snow shoveling duties—but more often, neighbors are simply neighbors. You wave when you take out the trash, you borrow a ladder when you’re in a pinch, and you keep an unspoken agreement to coexist.

As someone who has purchased five personal homes and invested in rental properties, I learned this lesson the hard way. Back when we were raising our family, we had what I’ll politely call “challenging” neighbors—one on each side. Their antics eventually drove us to move, and it stuck with me: a house is more than just walls, land, and location. The people surrounding it can shape your quality of life as much as anything inside the property line.

That’s why, to this day, whenever I consider buying a home—whether for myself or for tenants—I make a point to meet the neighbors first. I introduce myself, strike up a conversation, and do my best to “size things up.” I’m not looking for best friends, but I am looking for red flags. Are they respectful? Do they seem stable? Would I trust my family or future tenants living next to them?

Because at the end of the day, a good neighbor boils down to one simple thing: respecting your right to live peacefully.

A good neighbor is close enough that you know their name, that you could knock on their door in an emergency, or call them if something doesn’t seem right. But they’re not so close that you feel intruded upon, judged, or tangled up in daily drama. The sweet spot is mutual respect with a little bit of space.

Think of it like invisible property lines that extend beyond the deed. The grass doesn’t stop at the fence, and the sound doesn’t stop at the wall. A good neighbor understands those invisible lines and works to keep life on both sides balanced.

In the end, the best neighbors aren’t the ones who throw block parties every weekend or become your new best friends. They’re the ones you can count on when it matters—and the rest of the time, you hardly notice they’re there.