(Depending on the Day)

You know, every once in a while a writing prompt pops up that actually makes me laugh. Today’s was, “Share five things you’re good at.” Now, to be clear, I’m good at plenty of things… until I’m suddenly not. And I don’t mean big dramatic failures. I mean the everyday stuff that falls apart the minute I get distracted—which happens often, because my brain likes to wander around like it’s on a sightseeing tour.

So here are my five. Honest, slightly embarrassing, and very much me.

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1. I’m good at diagnosing the exact moment my body does something weird… and then overthinking it for the next 48 hours.

Listen, I know my body better than most people know their pets. If something twitches, tingles, hums, buzzes, or wiggles in a way it didn’t yesterday, my brain is already holding a medical seminar. Meanwhile, 99% of the time it’s just me sitting wrong or typing too much.

But hey—self-awareness is a talent, right?

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2. I’m good at telling a simple story that starts on one topic… and then somehow ends up in a completely different century.

I’ll begin talking about fixing a leaky faucet and somehow end up on the War of 1812 without warning. Don’t ask me how. Even I don’t know how. My conversations travel. They meander. They take scenic detours. They need a GPS and maybe a sherpa.

But people seem to enjoy the ride, so I’m calling it a strength.

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3. I’m good at remembering what I paid for something in 1979… but I can’t remember why I walked upstairs five minutes ago.

This one amazes me. I can tell you the exact price of a suit I bought at Macy’s 46 years ago, right down to the tax, but I’ll walk into a room and suddenly forget what planet I’m on. The upstairs becomes a Bermuda Triangle of intentions. Whatever I came up for is gone—gone—but I’ll notice a lightbulb that needs changing and suddenly that becomes the new mission.

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4. I’m good at turning one simple question into a full philosophical discussion about life.

You ask me, “How’s your day going?” and next thing you know, we’re deep into a conversation about free will, generational behavior, and the meaning of time. I don’t do small talk. I do big talk. My brain opens the door and invites the entire universe inside for a chat.

It’s entertaining. Occasionally exhausting. But always interesting.

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5. And finally… I’m excellent at organizing my workshop so perfectly it looks like a showroom—and then completely destroying it the very next day looking for one tiny screw.

This is my masterpiece of inconsistency. I’ll spend hours putting every tool exactly where it belongs, wiping down the bench, sorting nails by size, labeling bins like a pro. It’s beautiful. It’s inspiring.

And then the next morning I need one 3/8” bolt, and suddenly the place looks like a wild raccoon broke in and started a renovation project. I don’t even understand how fast it happens. Chaos follows me like a loyal pet.

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So there you have it—five things I’m “good” at, depending on how loosely we define the word “good.” But honestly, these quirks are part of the fun. They keep life interesting. They give me something to laugh about. And they remind me that perfection is overrated.

Besides, if everything went smoothly all the time, what would I even write about?